An alert to the whole Community: The Archivist is missing. Please contact us if you have any information about his whereabouts.
He was last seen this morning, working on an article for this website. Rachel T-, one of our volunteers, saw a bright blaze of orange light from his domain – he claims it is an office, but we all know a domain when we see one – and smartly rang the unidentified incident buzzer rather than rush into whatever phenomenon the Archivist encountered. By the time the response team was present the glow had gone, and so had the Archivist. We’re not ruling out the idea that he’s just popped over a dimension or two for some fact finding or urgent world-saving quest, but he usually leaves a note.
His unfinished article is below so… be careful in Brazil I guess?
Bastien Tensse has emerged again in Brazil. Local community members should take steps to lower the emissions of Orphic energy in the area in order to minimise any damage that he may cause. For example, ensure all siblings in a family are treated fairly, check that all the stepmothers you know are kind, or at least not abusive towards the children in their care (this one is good to do for its own sake), remove or hide any magical swords trapped in rocks or equivalent devices, keep local para-mundane creatures away from human contact, try releasing a particularly fascinating new Telenova to keep people occupied.
For those unaware, Bastien Tensse is a powerful example of a beautiful loser. He naturally seems to attract, or create, improbable situations. For a while he may ride high, but in the end his schemes always crash and burn. While he walks away unharmed, the people in his wake may not be so fortunate. We are limited in what we can do to stop these situations from occurring, because they are generally mundane (with the exception of the time he met an alien ambassador accidentally in a field), but we do know that the size of the event is often linked to the local Orphi
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